“Sonder” – the happiness that’s both INSIDE and OUTSIDE of your

by Dr Happy (aka Dr Tim Sharp) from this week’s free eNewsletter (you can register to receive yours HERE)

Happiness is most often thought of as a subjective and individual experience…

…which it is. But happiness is also a collective and social experience!

Happiness is partially about what we choose to do; how we choose to think; and how we choose to live our lives. All decisions that are usually considered as “internal”.

But we also know that happy people have both more and better quality relationships. So at least some of our happiness is “external”!

Today, I’m inviting you to consider a different and extended perspective on the “external” or social element of happiness or more generally, mood.

A crucial (but little known) concept that relates to this is known as “sonder”. Sonder is the realisation that every single person has their own dreams and ambitions and goals. And also that every single person has their own fears and insecurities and doubts.

We are, therefore, all the same in the sense that we’re happy and sad, confident and self-doubting, brave and scared…all at the same time.

The reason this idea, sonder, is important for happiness is that it helps us understand that we’re not alone, in our good or our bad. And knowing this helps us feel connected, rather than isolated. It can help us understand ourselves and others and so much more…