32 proven ways to become happier

There are so many proven ways to become happier.

And you’ve probably seen and heard of most, if not all of them.

But we all know that creating happiness is an ongoing, never ending project – so if you want a good summary of all the happiness boosting strategies out there, then keep reading…

via the Huffington Post by Andrew Merle

Want to design your life to make it happier?

Then start taking some tips from New York Times best-selling author Dan Buettner, who has spent the last 15 years studying the people around the world who are living the healthiest and happiest lives, and discovering what the rest of us can learn from them.

Buettner just released his latest book, The Blue Zones of Happiness, which reveals the secrets of the world’s happiest places (from Costa Rica to Denmark to Singapore), and shows how to apply their lessons to our own lives.

I recently finished the book (covering research from 141 countries overall), took detailed notes, and came away with 32 proven and actionable ways to make your life happier.

Some of these tips are simple and easy to implement immediately, while others are more relevant when considering major life changes.

I highly recommend reading the full book, but if you are short on time hopefully this cheat sheet will help you add more joy to your life.

The following happiness practices are broken out into four life categories: Social, Work, Self, and Home (with some obvious crossover among the four).

Social

1. Socialize for at least 6 hours per day

Research shows that people are happiest on days when they socialize for at least 6 hours. Unfortunately, Americans socialize for an average of only 41 minutes per day.

2. Live with a loving partner

3. Join a club that aligns with your interests and passions

Research has shown that joining a group that meets even once a month produces the same happiness boost as doubling your income.

This could be a book club, walking club, wine tasting club, faith-based club, sports club, or anything else that is meaningful for you. Prioritize clubs that have members similar to you in age, values, and interests in order to make new friends.

4. Choose a few active relationships with good friends over a lot of casual acquaintances

5. Set a weekly family dinner and invite your extended family

6. Develop daily social rituals

E.g. Impromptu happy hours, pot lucks, or backyard barbecues with friends…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

Happiness is other people

via the NY Times by Ruth Whippman

In a particularly low moment a few years back, after arriving friendless and lonely from Britain to live in the United States, I downloaded a “happiness app” onto my phone. It was surprisingly hard to choose one. There were close to a thousand bliss-promising options in the app store — ones that would teach you to meditate or be grateful, or that would send you photomontages of sunsets and puppies or unfeasibly flattering shots of your loved ones (giving you a moment to temporarily ignore your actual, less attractive loved ones.)

The app I eventually chose messaged me every hour or so with a positive affirmation that I was supposed to repeat to myself over and over. “I am beautiful,” or “I am enough.” The problem was, every time my phone buzzed with an incoming message, I would get a Pavlovian jolt of excitement thinking an actual person was trying to contact me. “I am enough,” I would snarl bitterly upon realizing the truth, unable to shake the feeling that, without friends or community, I really wasn’t.

“Happiness comes from within,” said the inspirational photo-card in my Facebook news feed a few days later, the loopy white meme-font set against a backdrop of a woman contorted into a yoga pose so tortuous it looked as though she might actually be investigating her own innards trying to locate her bliss.

Having spent the last few years researching and writing a book about happiness and anxiety in America, I’ve noticed that this particular strain of happiness advice — the kind that pitches the search for contentment as an internal, personal quest, divorced from other people — has become increasingly common. Variations include “Happiness is determined not by what’s happening around you, but what’s happening inside you”; “Happiness should not depend on other people”; and the perky and socially shareable “Happiness is an inside job.” One email I received from a self-help mailing list even doubled down on the idea with the turbocharged word mash-up “withinwards,” (although when the subject heading “Go Withinwards” landed in my inbox I briefly thought it was an ad for a nose-to-tail offal restaurant.)

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

Do this 1 thing to make the most of the last 2 months of this year!

via Inc.com by Nicolas Cole

Remember back in January, 2017, when you made that big long list of goals?

How many did you actually accomplish? How many did you give up on?

People have no problem setting goals.

The challenge is in seeing them through to the end.

With just two months left in the year, I encourage you think about your goals a bit differently. Come November, most people start to feel a great deal of angst about how the year went. They either feel a huge sense of accomplishment and choose to take it easy for the remainder of the year–or they feel a sense of failure and scramble to get somethingdone in order to feel accomplished.

I suggest not doing either.

The best way to finish a year out is to reflect on what worked, and what didn’t.

This isn’t something that needs to take weeks and weeks.

In fact, it should only take an hour–and you should do it this week.

Instead of kicking back and waiting for the year to end (and then starting 2018 behind), or instead of rushing to finish a half-baked project, make it a point this week to pause first.

Question how you got to this point.

If you’ve been productive, what caused that productivity? Good habits? Saying “No” to distractions?

If you’ve been unproductive, how did that happen? Bad habits? Saying “Yes” to things that are distractions?

Being successful, in any capacity, has just as much to do with understanding why things happen the way they do, as it does just putting your head down and grinding through it.

This week, here are some questions you should ask yourself…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

What really makes employees happy at work?

via Inc.com by Sonia Thompson

In the book The Happiness Advantage, author Shawn Achor laid out an abundance of scientific evidence proving that “happiness is the precursor to success, not merely the result.” The research shows that happiness among employees fuels performance and achievement, resulting in a competitive edge many companies crave.

But although the data points to why cultivating a happy culture is a smart growth strategy, many businesses struggle with how to do so. As a result, far too many companies end up with a workforce that is disengaged and draining more value than they are contributing. No bueno.

Thankfully, one company did the work to give you some insights on what employees need most to feel happy at work, as well as how to deliver on that feedback.

What really makes employees happy at work

Dapulse, creators of a workplace collaboration tool designed to help teams operate within a culture of transparency, conducted a survey of 10,000 of its users. In their research, they asked a simple question:

What makes you happy at work?

Leah Walters, head of communications at Dapulse, gave some insight into the findings:

“Of the eight attributes that we offered people to ‘rank the order of what makes you happiest,’ salary came last. It came last amongst the manager section, and it came last among general working employees…Of course, there’s this certain amount of money that people need to survive, and that’s very important, but beyond that, people are looking for different kinds of things.”

She noted that the attributes that rose to the top of what drove employee happiness was working for a company that was best in its field, supported innovation, and had the kind of culture that they wanted to work in.

Company culture, their data noted, is rising to the top as a reason why employees love going to work each day. And increasingly, businesses are working to incorporate attractive perks that help contribute to positive culture…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

Don’t try to think your way out of unhappiness; try these tips instead…

via Inc.com by Matthew Jones

Even the smartest and most successful people are unhappy. Take one of my clients, I’ll call him George, for example.

George is a key player in a large tech firm. He’s not only a driven team leader always aiming to improve performance, he’s also intelligent, wealthy, and–you guessed it–unhappy.

He’s the type of guy who, no matter what problem you throw at him, will find a solution and excel–he’s just that determined. Unfortunately, his masterful ability maintain a laser-like focus on evolving goals–the thing that makes him successful–also is the mechanism that prevents his happiness.

Happiness is widely misunderstood.

In the context of our Western culture, Americans are taught that happiness is an external object–a commodity that can be purchased. We think that we’ll be happy once we “earn enough money,” or get the respect and recognition we deserve, but none of these things have anything to do with real happiness.

Genuine happiness emerges when you stop creating your own unhappiness.

Unhappiness is thinking. The mind is the most brilliant tool we have as humans. When applied strategically, it can improve people’s lives and lead to positive social change. But when you live in a world created by the mind–constantly comparing yourselves to others, thinking about the future, ruminating over the past–then there’s no escaping it.

You are bound to your thoughts.

Caged like an animal, you have no idea that you shackled yourself. You built the trap and then walked into it. By the time you started avoiding uncomfortable emotions by trying to think your way out of them, the plan was already set in motion.

The truth is that happiness is the unconditioned presence in which we all exist.

To discover happiness, then, means that you need to get out of your own way. You need to find the volume dial of your mind, and turn it down. You need to recognize that your thinking–your search for a solution to your pain, your seeking of external happiness, and your contemplation of all things outside of the present moment–creates unhappiness.

If real happiness is the sun, you are the clouds.

These clouds fill with rain the more that you think through your emotional discomfort, the more that you remove yourself from the here-and-now, the more that you dilute your experience of now with thoughts of then. The darker and denser these clouds become, the less light you see, the less warmth you feel, and the faster you forget that the sun is always shining.

Stop preventing the rain.

Allow your thoughts to flow like leaves on a river. There’s no need to get hyper-focused on each one. There’s no need to give them more power than they deserve. Even if thinking is what makes you successful, like George, you still need to practice turning down the volume so that your emotions can be fully embraced, experienced, honored–and then, understood.

When you turn down the volume of your thoughts, you become more intelligent. You become more attuned to the feeling-of-being, the presence in which we all exist. And when you feel that sacred rhythm, like waves in the ocean, you realize that happiness is always present–the sun is always shining.

Real happiness is being–not doing.

A famous guru named Krishnamurti once said, “The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.” And he’s correct–the most intelligent people are the ones who recognize the limitations and shortcomings of their mind.

In my work with George, five simple steps aided our ability to deepen his experience of happiness…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

8 ways to take charge of your life!

Happiness is partly about accepting the realities of the word…good and bad.

But happiness is also taking charge of that which can be changed and controlled!

So today, in the interests of creating more happiness and better lives, I’m happy to share with you 8 powerful ways to take charge of your life…

via Pick The Brain by Joseph Chukwube

Quite a lot of people have, at one time or another, found themselves at the last rung of the ladder.

If you do a random sampling, you will find out that a lot of people have passed through this stage of life.

While some decided to resign to fate, others felt they must put in a fight to effect a change in their fortunes.

The fact is that we can fall at any point in our life but what makes the difference and what determines the type of stuff you are made of is whether or not you are able to pick yourself up, dust your butt, and tell yourself “I’m going to give it a resounding whack.”

If for any reason you are struggling to pick yourself up and take charge of your life, the following 8 effective ways come in handy as the magic wand you have been waiting for.

1. Avoid detractors

As someone striving to stand back on their feet, this is the very first thing you should do.

Detractors are the people who originally wanted you to be in that situation. They are a total bunch of no-gooders

They prefer to have you laze about with them. They practically have no goal in life and you will only end up being miserable in their midst.

2. People already walked the path, Pick a role model

Now that you have decided to take charge, it will make a very big step in the right direction if you have a role model. This is somebody you may like to fashion your life after.

Incidentally, there are thousands of people who have made it starting from the scratch. You may even discover that what you experienced was more of a stumble when you come across some of the successful individuals who call the shots today.

3. Don’t just work, Map out your goals

Goals and targets put a spirit of competition into all you do. You must have a yardstick to measure how far you are going about accomplishing what you have set out to do.

You will be charged up to do more once you realize that you are not meeting up with your target.

“Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible.” – Tony Robbins

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

30 Ways to Come Alive, and Not Just Exist

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
Howard Thurman

“The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.”
Jack London

It’s so easy to get stuck in a rut. Maybe for a day or two. Or as weeks bleed into months and nothing much happens.

You just trudge along. You go through the motions, life is on autopilot.

It feels OK. But at the same time you have a small voice whispering at the back of your mind.

It says “It’s time to make a change”. Or “When will I start to truly live my life?”.

In this article you’ll find 30 suggestions and reminders that can help you to stop going through the motions. To disconnect the autopilot and to come alive again.

In both bigger and smaller ways.

I hope you’ll find something here that truly resonates with you.

1. Appreciate what you have. When you are stuck in autopilot then it is very easy to forget to be grateful for what you actually have. The basic fundamentals that so many people lack, the people who like or even love you and the amazing wonders of the world.
2. Find the optimism. Become more aware of the negative thoughts you have and don’t let them drag you down. Instead, find one thing that is positive or helpful in the long run in the situation you are in. Then build on that. The more you do it, the more this kind of thinking will become a habit and soon your mind will start reacting in a more positive and constructively imaginative way no matter what situation you find yourself in.
3. Have a day of smiling. Instead of just going along in your usual way take a day off from that. And smile towards everyone you meet. The lady in the checkout line at the supermarket, your co-workers and the people closest to you. How does that affect how you feel about yourself and your life? And how does it change your interactions and day?
4. Eat something else. If you usually have the beef for lunch then go for the fish. Or the vegetarian dish. Or try something you have never eaten before.
5. Listen to something else. One of the simplest ways to burst of out the same old rut is to find something new to listen to. Like with the food, take one or more steps outside of your comfort zone. Your taste in music may not be as narrow as you believe – that has certainly been the case for me – and this simple thing can really expand your world.
6. Slow down. When you slow down you naturally connect better with what is happening inside of you and outside you in this moment. What happens right now becomes more vibrant and not hidden behind thoughts racing in your mind about the past or a possible future. Slow down to enjoy the moment and to not miss life while you are planning for the future or reliving the past.
7. Be your own best friend. When you stumble, when you fall and when you have a dream then cheer yourself on. Instead of beating yourself up or talking yourself out what YOU deep down want. It makes life so much lighter and happier. Check out the Self-Esteem Course for more on this.
8. Enjoy the small things. This becomes easier when you slow down. There are so many small things happening all around that you may miss out on if you rush quickly to the next thing. So take the time and use your attention to enjoy the small things. A long hug, a walk in the woods, a sunset or the full moon rising among so many stars in the night sky.
9. Be you. What do you want out of life? What do you want more of in your life? Take some time to think about it and just for a little while forget what your parents, partner or boss might want. Sure, you might have to compromise on some things. But don’t let anyone else run your life and run over your dreams. This is in the end your life to live.
10. Forgive. When you don’t forgive someone then you are stuck in negativity and suffering even if the person who wronged you may have moved on. So you don’t have to forgive to be a good person to someone else. Do it for yourself. To be your own best friend. For your own happiness. And for the rest of your years and decades on this earth.
11. Disconnect. When we are online and sitting in front of a computer or a smart phone during so much of our day then it is easy to miss what else we can do with our time and attention. So disconnect more to connect in real life more fully. Disconnect to find other activities you may want to try. Disconnect to just get a break and to come back on Monday or a few weeks later with renewed enthusiasm and energy.
12. Feel the pain. Not all days will be great or fun. Suffering is a natural part of life too. We lose people in our lives for different reasons. We lose our pets. We lose our jobs or get sick. And sometimes we just have a terrible day. Don’t try to escape it but feel it. It is a part of living fully and the deeper the pain carves for a time the more joy and appreciation of life and what you have you’ll be able to hold later on.
13. Breathe. Take a couple of minutes out of your day and sit down in a quiet spot. Then breathe a little deeper than usual and focus only on the air going and out out. Nothing else. By doing so you calm your mind and body down and you reconnect sharply and fully with the present moment you’re in.
14. Exercise. You are not just a mind. You are a body too. So take care of it. Do some pushups. Go out walking or running for just a bit at first. Play a sport. You’ll come alive more and your mind will become more centered and focused.
15. Find your passion. Painting. Making and performing music. Writing. Playing soccer. Helping people out. Traveling. Being the best parent you can be. Or something entirely else. Explore what you are passionate about and make sure you regularly free up time and space for it in your life.
16. Let go of filler-activities. So how do you find more time for your passions and for finding new ones? By letting go of some filler-activities in your life. Disconnect more often. And watch a few less hours of TV each week. Stop playing that videogame that you aren’t honestly that enthusiastic about. If a book is not good you do not have to finish it. Don’t just go through the motions here either; rethink how you spend your free time and energy.
17. Travel. I love traveling and seeing something new and I highly recommend it. No matter if you go to a country half a across the world. Or discover a town or beautiful small spot in nature much, much closer to home. There are, in my experience, usually more wonderful places nearby than you might think.
18. Take a chance. Ask someone out for a date instead of hesitating or waiting around any longer. Start your own side-business based on your passion. Start writing that book you have in your head and when you are done and if no publisher is interested at the moment then self-publish it on Kindle and other platforms.
19. Let go when you have no other way forward. Sometimes things do not work out in a relationship, at a job or in your side-project or business. You try to fix it, to mend things, perhaps to grow it in a new direction. Sometimes it helps. But not always. It just gets worse and worse. Then you may try one last time. Or you move on because it is time to start over and to create something better.
20. Build and cultivate an environment that will support and lift you up. The people you have close by and a bit further away from you and the information you let into your life will have a huge effect on your outlook and what you focus on and take action on. So choose wisely. And spend more of your time and energy with the people and information that lift you up and makes you come alive.
21. Make someone you love come alive with an unexpected gift. It could be a bouquet of flowers you went out picking in the spring grass. A note with a kind and loving message hidden in your partner’s or child’s lunchbox or book. Or a dinner that is ready as she or he arrives tired from work or school. See him or her come alive with big smile and feel how you come alive too.
22. Take a different route home. If you always take the same route home from school or work then do something different today. Walk, drive or ride your bike on a route where you have never been before. See new things instead of spending that journey home on going over the day or your plans.
23. Declutter. Simplify and change your environment to nudge your thoughts in a new and clearer direction too. Pick one small part of your home for example. Then go through each item there and ask yourself: Have I used this item in the past year? If not, give the it away to charity or a friend. Or you can simply throw it out.
24. Have a day of kindness. Take a break from the criticism, sarcasm and irony. Just for a day. And instead be kind, friendly and understanding as best you can to everyone you meet that day, including yourself. And see what happens.
25. Start with a morning ritual for clarity. Wake up slowly. Perhaps reflect on a few things you are grateful for. Sit in silence and calmness for just a minute or two before you start your day. Setting the tone for the rest of your day like this makes it easier to stop, reflect and to enjoy and appreciate what happens as you move through it.
26. Face a fear. You don’t have to leap right into it at full speed. Instead, if that feels too scary, take one small step forward. Then another one. It might be both scary and exciting but not so uncomfortable that you back down.
27. Spend your weekend in a way you usually don’t. If you usually stay at home and don’t do much besides reading and watching a movie or two then fill your next weekend with a few activities you rarely or never do. Like going on a trip. Hiking. Going down to the pub or a restaurant and drinking the finest beers or wines in company of a good friend. If you usually fill your weekends with activities away from home consider just taking it easy with a book on the couch.
28. Run in the rain. Do something that might not feel like something you would do. When everyone else are happy to be inside and watching TV under a blanket as the rain hits the windows lace up your shoes. And go out running for a few minutes while feeling every drop hitting you.
29. Free up some time for lazying around or having fun. It is easy to get lost in just serious thoughts or in being productive. To not make room in your schedule for much more than that. But you may need something else from time to time and so make room for that too. It could be a tickle-fight. Or simply lying in the grass for a while doing nothing and watching the clouds drift by.
30. Just do something new. I have already mentioned eating, listening etc. as areas where you can do something new. Don’t just stop there though. Think outside the frame I set in this article. Do something new, no matter what you are interested in. The important thing is that you take a look at where you are or what you are curious about and then explore or expand upon one thing and see how it makes you feel. How it makes you come alive with a smile again.

If happiness is about being true to oneself, what does it really mean to be a man?

by Dr Tim Sharp (aka Dr Happy) 

For a variety of reasons, over the last few weeks and months, I’ve been thinking quite a bit about what it means to be a “man”.

As I’m sure many of you know, I’m actively involved in a range of mental health services and organisations and causes, and the sad reality is that men tend to be poorer at reaching out and getting the help they need.

Why is this? Why would so many men choose to suffer more than they need to and choose to suffer in silence? 

Well, I think there are a number of answers to this complex question; but at the core of all of them is the definition of “manhood” and/or “masculinity”.

Typically, manhood is associated with words and constructs such as courage and strength, determination and forcefulness, self-reliance and sturdiness.

Unfortunately, these words are too often understood by too many as meaning…resolutely standing and/or coping on one’s own, not needing or asking for assistance, resisting showing any signs of weakness of vulnerability.

And herein lies the problem!

These are all key contributors to distress and suffering. Whereas real resilience and effective coping often involves the opposites of such concepts such as unashamedly expressing emotions, reaching out and accepting help, forming strong and open connections and realising imperfection is a universal feature of humanity (for men and for women).

In my humble opinion, therefore, what’s needed is a new definition of “manhood”; or more realistically, a realisation that there are many definitions of manhood…different versions for different men in different contexts. 

Dr Tim Lomas, a UK academic, has researched and written a lot about “masculinities”, the idea that more than one type of masculinity exists. And just thinking about this notion would, in my humble opinion, have a massive, positive impact on many man (and, therefore, on many wives, girlfriends, mothers, children and more).

Because what it means is that each of us can choose to define our own version of “manhood”; one that suits our personalities and builds on our strengths and is appropriate for our lives within our cultures and communities.

My manhood may well be different to yours, and my manhood may well be different to my son’s … but surely that can be a good thing! 

7 simple things you can do to improve your life starting next week…

via Inc.com by Marcel Schwantes

If personal development and self-improvement is your thing, you should really appreciate this list to kick off your week on a high note. First off though, I need to communicate its true intent so there are no misgivings or misinterpretations.

As you scroll further, you’ll notice a pattern (which could repel many of you expecting a magic pill solution to solve all your problems): Life is really about giving, service, and meaningful relationships. Having discovered this years ago, everything for me started to evolve– business success, lasting friendships, health and well-being.

Many of the activities below can be done in as little as a few minutes per day. Others will require some stretching as they will call you to stand in the divine space of putting others first.

As you make these rituals habitual and rewire your brain to the positive, you’ll start to see immediate benefits: More inner peace, lasting joy and, ultimately, great success as people will be drawn to you like a magnet.

Monday: Try a “five-minute favor.”

“Five-minute favors” are selfless giving acts without asking for anything in return. Examples of five-minute favors include: sharing knowledge, making an introduction, serving as a reference for a person, product, or service, or recommending someone on LinkedIn, Yelp, or another social place. As Adam Grant, author of Give and Take points out, by paying it forward, you are more successful without expecting a quid pro quo. And you aren’t just helping others in five focused minutes of giving. You are supporting the emotional spread of this practice–it becomes contagious.

Tuesday: Align your purpose with doing something to help another person.

Remind yourself frequently that the purpose of your life is not to work 10 hours per day, five days per week for 30 years, then retire to a golf course in Florida. Your true purpose should be to discover your calling in life, basking in the joy of the journey along the way, one step at a time. In the end, remember that your legacy is left to these two important questions:

• What impact did I make on the lives of others?
• Who did I serve and make better?

…for more happiness and success and a better life, keep reading HERE for the full week’s self-improvement program!

Here are 6 of the biggest myths about happiness you really need to smash!

via ScienceAlert by Chris Weller

Some people see happiness as the feeling in a small moment – a chat between old friends, a warm meal. Some see it as deeply profound, a kind of enlightenment.

Scientists tend to view it another way, namely, as an ongoing state of being that ebbs and flows – but can be controlled based on how people live their lives.

Some of the biggest findings about the science of happiness contradict many people’s understandings of how to find joy.

Here are just a handful of those misconceptions.

1. More money does increase happiness – but only to a point.

A higher salary is always nice, but it won’t necessarily increase your happiness, a wide body of research suggests. Some early behavioural economics studies found that a salary of roughly US$75,000 a year was the point at which happiness began to plateau.

Follow-up research has found similar plateaus based on the cost-of-living in your particular area. Someone in Atlanta, for example, will hit peak happiness by making roughly US$42,000 a year, while a New Yorker will need to pull in US$105,000.

2. Happiness comes from giving gifts, not receiving them.

Unwrapping presents on a holiday or birthday is undeniably fun, but science suggests the person who bought and wrapped those gifts is gaining more happiness than you are.

A 2008 study found that people’s reported levels of happiness jumped when they spent money on others instead of on themselves. A follow-up study in 2013 showed that the finding applied to people in 136 countries, not just those in North America.

And earlier this year, a study showed a neural link between generosity and happiness, further cementing humans as fundamentally social animals…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

Taking control of these 8 factors will bring you more happiness at work

via Inc.com by Wanda Thibodeaux

From Google’s nap pods to Nike’s basketball court, modern companies are going way (sometimes way, way) over the top to try to keep employees cheery. But when push comes to shove, controlling these eight factors might matter significantly more for your happinessthan a bunch of perks.

1. Lack of boundaries

This can involve the coworker who just can’t seem to stop finding their way to your desk to chat exactly when you’re busiest. But it also can translate to being pulled into different roles on a whim, work events repeatedly preventing you from enjoying home life or others sharing more personal information than you care to hear.

2. Excessively strict routine

Some consistency in a daily, weekly or monthly schedule can be soothing, as familiaritytypically helps people feel comfortable and secure. But if the routine is too stringent, you don’t have the flexibility to express yourself, check out new opportunities and grow. All you have is the hopeless feeling you’re stuck in the movie Groundhog’s Day where nothing will ever get better.

3. Control

Maybe your team lead micromanages over your shoulder to check every word you type. Or maybe a coworker flips out on you because you dared to open the blinds all the way in the conference room (you know they can’t work in more than 1,000 lumens!). In any case, trying to control absolutely everything is often more about fear and wanting to feel safe than it is simply minimizing risks…

…for more tips on happiness at work, and the full & original article, just click HERE

Change your life with these 13 awesome questions

Happiness isn’t having all the answers.

Happiness is more about asking the right questions.

So if you want to change your life for the better and enjoy more happiness then ask these 13 life changing questions now…

via CNBC.com by Travis Bradberry

When things aren’t going quite the way you’d like them to, it’s often the result of not asking yourself the right questions. Some questions are hard to confront because you’re afraid you won’t get the answer you want, others because you really don’t want to know the answer.

But the best things in life don’t come easily, and turning away from life’s toughest questions is a sure path to mediocrity. I believe that Socrates said it best:

“The unexamined life isn’t worth living.”

Socrates’ observation also applies to business. When Eric Schmidt was CEO of Google, he famously said, “We run this company on questions, not answers.”

Life, like business, runs on questions, not answers. Let’s take a closer look at some of the tough questions we should be asking ourselves regularly.

How do people see me differently than I see myself?

Have you ever heard a recording of your voice and thought, “Is that what I really sound like?” Because of the way the sound of the voice travels through the human skull, we never hear ourselves the same way that everybody else hears us. The same is often true for the way we behave. We interpret our behavior in terms of how we think we come across, whereas everyone else sees the real thing.

A 360° assessment is a great way to gain this perspective. It gathers feedback that is constructive, anonymous, and accurate. If you forego the 360 and solicit feedback in person, make certain you ask for feedback that is specific, avoiding broad questions and generalizations.

For example, you’re more likely to get an honest and accurate answer to, “How well did I handle myself in the meeting when everyone disagreed with me?” than to, “Am I a good boss?” And be careful to show that you’re receptive to the feedback. If you flip out or get defensive every time somebody speaks their mind, they’re going to stop doing it.

What/whom did I make better today?

That’s another way of saying, “Leave things better than you found them.” Ending each day by asking yourself what or whom you made better is a great way to keep yourself grounded and focused on what really matters.

Am I being true to my values?

Do you ever get that nagging feeling that something is a little off in your life? This often happens when little behaviors creep up on you that violate your values. If spending quality time with your family is one of your primary values, but you keep staying late at work, there’s a conflict. If you want that nagging little voice to go away, you’re going to have to do something about it…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

How to Bring Inner Peace Into Your Life: 15 Things You Can Start Doing Today

“The simplification of life is one of the steps to inner peace. A persistent simplification will create an inner and outer well-being that places harmony in one’s life.”
Peace Pilgrim

“Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.”
Wayne Dyer

The daily life can be busy, hectic and at times overwhelming.

It may sometimes feel like bringing just a little more inner peace and calmness into your life is a hopeless wish.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. Small and smart changes can over time make a big difference.

So today I’d like to share 15 of my own favorite tips for finding more peace and calmness in everyday life.

1. Set limits. If your life is overfilled you may need to set some limits. So stop doing some of the least important things, the things that honestly don’t matter that much. Set a limit for how many times you will check inboxes, Instagram, Twitter etc. per day. And say no if you really don’t have the time.
2. Find a relaxation technique that works for you. I like belly breathing and working out to release tensions and recharge during the day. What works for you? Long walks, music, yoga, meditation or going for a swim? Find out and do that.
3. Don’t make mountains out of molehills. This can create a lot of unnecessary stress. When facing what looks like a mountain ask yourself questions like: Does someone on the planet have it worse than me right now? Will this matter in 5 years? These questions help you to zoom out and realize that things may not be that bad and that you can handle them.
4. Slow down. Your emotions work backwards too. If you slow down while walking, moving your body or talking you can often start to feel less stressed (compared to if you move/talk fast). Slowing down to decrease stress goes for many other things you do in everyday life too like riding your bicycle, working at your desk and eating.
5. Unclutter your world, unclutter your mind. Just take 3 minutes to declutter your workspace or the room you’re in. A uncluttered, simplified and ordered space around you brings clarity and order to the mind. So don’t stop there. Declutter, simplify and organize your home and life too to live in a more relaxing environment.
6. Use a minimalistic workspace. My work space is just a laptop on a wooden desk. I use a comfy chair and there is room for my glass of water beside the computer. That’s it. There are no distractions here. Just me, the computer and the water. This brings peace and makes it easier to focus during my working hours.
7. Be 10 minutes early. It’s a small habit but it has transformed much of my travel time during the year from a slightly or very stressful time to periods of relaxation and recharging.
8. Accept and let go. Now is now. But if something negative from the past – something someone said, something someone did – is still on your mind then accept and let that feeling and thought in instead of trying to push it away. When you accept that it is then it starts to lose power. And while the facts may still be there in your head the negative feelings become a lot less powerful. At this point, let that thing go like you are throwing out a bag of old clothes. And direct your focus to the present moment and something better instead.
9. Ask instead of guessing. Reading minds is pretty much impossible. But still we often try it and create anxiety, uncertainty and misguided conclusions for ourselves. So ask and communicate instead. It may sometimes be a bit hard at first but it can save you and the people around you so much trouble in the long run.
10. Escape for a while. Read a novel, watch your favorite TV-show or a movie. It’s simple but it works well to just release pressure and relax.
11. Solve a problem that is weighing down on you. Don’t procrastinate anymore. Solve your problem and release it and all the underlying stress and tension that it is creating in your life. You probably already know what to do, you are just not doing it yet. But the longer you wait the worse the tension inside becomes. So get up from your chair and get started on doing it for just 1-3 minutes right now.
12. Disconnect over the weekend. Leave your work – and work phone – where it belongs. Disconnect or at least limit your internet activity and the checking of your smart phone over the weekend. And spend more of your Saturdays and Sundays with an undivided attention on your family, friends, hobby or maybe being out in nature.
13. Remember the 5 little words that’ll help you to stay sane: one thing at a time. By keeping those words in mind and letting them guide you through your day and week you’ll be less stressed and more focused (and that will not only bring more inner peace but also help you to do a better and quicker job at pretty much anything).
14. Breathe. When stressed, lost in a problem or the past or future in your mind breathe with your belly for two minutes and just focus on the air going in and out. This will calm your body down and bring your mind back into the present moment again.
15. Remember: There’s a day tomorrow too. Sometimes you have a bad day. Or life interferes with your plans for the day. And so you don’t get what you had planned or hoped for done. The best way to handle such a situation is – in my experience – simply to kindly tell yourself that there’s a day tomorrow too and that you can get it done then. Beating yourself up is on the other hand not a smart or helpful strategy.

Ancient ideas to improve your modern life

Happiness is not a new concept.

Living a good life is not a new concept.

Not all that’s good and useful is new!

In fact, there’s much we can learn from “ancient thinkers” about happiness and success and more; and here are 7 great ideas for you now…

via The Ladders by Eric Barker

The modern world has brought us a lot of great stuff. (I, for one, am a huge fan of antibiotics.)

That said, we know there are things that were better in the past, ideas we can learn from or reclaim.

What’s interesting is recently science and experts have validated many of the lessons ancient thinkers knew but could not prove.

Here are 7 new ideas from the old world that can make your life better:

1) Community Is Vital

For 99% of human existence we lived in small tribes. We were constantly surrounded by family and friends.

Jared Diamond, author of Guns, Germs, and Steel, says it’s obvious why hunter-gatherers join modern society and not the other way around…

…but what are the advantages of the traditional world that they leave behind?

Always being surrounded by the people they love.

Via The World Until Yesterday:

Loneliness is not a problem in traditional societies. People spend their lives in or near the place where they were born, and they remain surrounded by relatives and childhood companions… As one American friend who spends much time in Africa summed it up, “Life in Africa is materially poor and socially/ emotionally rich, while U.S. life is materially rich and socially/ emotionally poor.”

And, no, Facebook is not a replacement for time with friends:

In one experiment, Cacioppo looked for a connection between the loneliness of subjects and the relative frequency of their interactions via Facebook, chat rooms, online games, dating sites, and face-to-face contact. The results were unequivocal. “The greater the proportion of face-to-face interactions, the less lonely you are,” he says. “The greater the proportion of online interactions, the lonelier you are.”

Not feeling socially connected can make you stupider and lead to an early death:

When people’s sense of social connectedness is threatened, their ability to self-regulate suffers; for instance their IQ performance drops (Baumeister, Twenge, & Nuss, 2002). Feeling lonely predicts early death as much as major health risk behaviors like smoking (Cacioppo & Patrick, 2008).

The solution? Use technology to facilitate face to face meetings with friends, not to replace them.

(For more on how to improve your social life, go here.)

We definitely need others, but what did our ancestors know about feeling better as an individual?

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

You need to embrace this 1 thing if you want to become an expert in anything…including happiness!

Happiness…is it something you can become “expert” in?

Well, I’m not sure anyone can ever completely master happiness; at least not 100%, but that’s OK.

We can all “get better” at happiness, just like anything else, and here’s one of the most important tips for achieving this…

via Inc.com by Jon Levy

To uncover the secrets of success, everyone looks to industry experts and global influencers for answers. After all, they’ve been there and done that. However, replicating Oprah’s daily habit or waking up at 5 A.M. every morning won’t help you become an expert or achieve your own success.

After interviewing some of the most impressive people in the world for the Influencers podcast, one surprising admission kept popping up: Nobody knows what they are doing.

No one–no matter how talented and intelligent–starts out as an expert. Do you think Neil Degrasse Tyson was chatting about astrophysics from birth? That Stacy London has been a fashion icon since infancy?

Even after years of experience, they still make mistakes and experience failure like the rest of us. Contrary to what you may believe, their lack of certainty and awareness of it is the key to their success.

Here are three reasons why:

1. We learn more from being wrong.

Through experience and much trial and error, they’ve developed expertise, but that doesn’t mean that they are always right or even close. In reality, most are strongly familiar with failure and being wrong, because they’ve had to make countless mistakes to get to where they are now.

When I chatted with Nobel Prize winner Martin Chalfie, he said, “You have to deal with failure in every walk of life.” Embrace your failures and mistakes, because they could be what leads you to your greatest discovery yet…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

What if you were to think of happiness as a skill that you can develop?

For those who’re not subscribed (and you can sign up HERE), here’s my Monday Morning Free eNewsletter…

If you’re at a sporting event or a music concert or even if you’re just at the park watching someone do something cool, do you think…

…he/she must have just been born like that (i.e. being able to play professional sport or making amazing music or ride a skateboard etc)?

Probably not! You might think they’re lucky having the right genetic make-up but you probably also understand that they’ve had to work hard and had to practice a lot to achieve what they’ve achieved (just like going to the gym to get fit and strong).

Similarly, if you taste some wonderful food created by a talented chef do you think…they were just born to cook?

Probably not (again)!

Most of us understand that achieving “success” and “competence” in any area usually requires time and practice and effort (in the gym or in the studio or in the kitchen). So why would happiness be any different???

What if you were to think of happiness in the same way – as a skill that requires practice and diligence and “working out”? Because in my humble opinion, that’s the best way to think about it!

There’s no doubt that just as in those other areas already mentioned, “natural ability” will play some role; but there’s also no doubt that with effort and devotion happiness can be created and enhanced.

…So that’s today’s mailing. Take some time to reflect upon the message and how it might apply to you. Check out, also, the links below for some additional readings and resources.

I hope it helps you enjoy some more happiness. Until next time…

Keep well & keep smiling
Tim Sharp (aka Dr Happy)

There are so many reasons to have a hobby!

I often post about happiness at work.

And about the relationships between happiness and health and wellbeing.

But what about the happiness of … hobbies!?!?

Recreational past times are often underestimated; but as this article shows, they shouldn’t be…

via Entrepreneur by Dhavel Patel

Feeling stressed, overworked or overwhelmed? There’s a simple solution that can bring more happiness to your life and improve your working life:

Get a hobby.

Having a passion in life that is equal (if not greater) to your work can improve your professional life in an incredible number of ways. I say this from experience: In my own life, my photography hobby has been a lifesaver in terms of helping me attain balance in my career. Not only does switching gears to photography give me personal fulfillment, but it has also taught me creative and problem-solving skills that have actively helped me advance in my career. It’s also provided a well-needed respite from the daily grind.

Here, I’ll share a few ways that my photography hobby has made me better at my day job; these benefits are fairly universal to hobbies and careers of all sorts, though.

1. It makes you more interesting.

If you only care about work and nothing else, chances are you’re not a dynamic individual who people love to network with — you’re probably just another boring workaholic.

A hobby can help you hold a conversation and connect with people on a level that goes beyond just business.

2. It can increase your creativity.

One of the biggest benefits of having a hobby is that it makes you more creative. This increased creativity can have a number of positive effects when it comes to your profession.

For example, if I take the time to go out into nature and take photographs, I have a whole new set of creative decisions to make. How should I crop that shot? What angle should I take it from? Having the ability to problem-solve in such a pleasurable way can bring a new perspective to my work, too, allowing me to creatively and constructively come up with solutions when necessary.

3. It can help you decompress.

Having a hobby lets you take your mind off of work. Believe it or not, more work isn’t necessarily better. Constant email-checking doesn’t actually make you better at your job, and sometimes a break is necessary to be able to constructively look at your work again and increase productivity. This dovetails nicely into the next point . . .

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

This is the most important thing if you want to achieve your goals!

Happiness is partly about success.

Happiness comes at least in part from accomplishment and achievement.

When we achieve our goals we feel good, satisfied, happy.

So for those wanting more happiness, check out this great article focusing on goal achievement…

via Inc.com by Scott Mautz

Breaking news–persevering in the face of adversity is hard. I mean like trying to get the drawstring back out of the hole in your sweatpants hard.

There’s a reason why only eight percent of us achieve our New Year’s resolutions. (I mean besides the polar vortex, which of course, screws us all up).

In fact, the nature of persevering is so hard that we must look to human nature itself for clues on how to help in this endeavor.

The first clue lies in the word persevere itself where you find two words: “sever” and “severe.”

Hold that thought.

Now, let’s turn to psychology, where a research team from the University of Toronto has underscored a debilitating human tendency: When we sense we’re falling short of a goal, we tend to abandon ship too soon…

…keep reading the full & original article, with the “secret”, HERE

11 ways to become more confident

Imagine enjoying more happiness.

Imagine a happier and more successful life.

But you know that this happiness and success will require changes; and changing requires confidence. So confidence, therefore, is essential to happiness and self-improvement.

The good news is there are scientifically proven ways to boost your confidence; and here are 11 of them…

via Entrepreneur by Tomas Laurinavicius

Self-doubt kills more dreams than any failure ever will, and the only way to battle it is with rock-solid confidence.

Confidence is not a reflection of what you can or can’t do. It is merely a belief of what you can or can’t achieve. Like most things, it is always changing and resembles a swinging pendulum. However, there are some confirmed ways to help you remain in control.

I compiled a list of 11 proven hacks designed to build and maintain self-confidence…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

How to stop betraying your goals and start achieving them

We all know about goal setting.

And we all know that setting and working towards meaningful goals will boost our happiness and success.

But we all also know, if we’re honest with ourselves, that there are many times we undermine ourselves, our happiness and our success by allowing distractions to interfere with what we should be doing to accomplish what we want to accomplish.

So what?

Well if you want more happiness and success then this great article shows us how…

via The Huffington Post by Favour Abalogu

It’s frustrating.

You attempt countless times to accomplish, at least, one goal daily. But at the end of each day, you go back to the list, and your goals welcome you with a frown.

You just betrayed them, once again.

Although you promised to set them loose by accomplishing them, you failed to keep your promise.

Now, your goals lay inert.

Waiting to be achieved. Waiting to be completed. Waiting to be attended to.

Some months ago, you were all fired up. Ready to crush every goal that crossed your path.

But today, the reverse is the case. You’ve become so weak that you even find it hard to mute the evil voice within you that says you are nothing but a loser.

You now believe you can’t set goals and achieve them. In fact, you’ve concluded in your heart that people who succeed at crushing their goals are extraordinary beings.

But the truth is:

You are just as “extraordinary” as the millions of people around the world who set goals and crush them.

The only problem is, they know what works—but you don’t.

All you know is that every goal you set must be:

Specific (S). Measurable (M). Achievable (A). Realistic (R). Time-bound (T).

Granted, the goals you set must be SMART. But there are other useful tips you must know before you can achieve any goal.

Below are these tips…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

For anyone interested in positive parenting…

As a parent I want my children to be happy.

And every parent I’ve ever spoken to lists happiness as one of the top few things they want for their kids (along with health and success etc).

But happiness isn’t everything.

Happiness is good; but we can’t be happy all the time and our children won’t be happy all the time.

So what’s just as important as wanting happiness for our children is to want them to be “mentally strong”. And the good news is this is something we (as parents) can help them learn…

via Inc.com by Amy Morin

Raising a mentally strong kid doesn’t mean he won’t cry when he’s sad or that he won’t fail sometimes. Mental strength doesn’t make you immune to hardship and it’s not about suppressing your emotions.

In fact, it’s quite the opposite. Mental strength is what helps kids bounce back from setbacks and it gives them the strength to keep going, even when they’re plagued with self-doubt. A strong mental muscle is the key to helping kids reach their greatest potential in life.

But raising a mentally strong kid requires parents to avoid the common–yet unhealthy–parenting practices that rob kids of mental strength. In my book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do, I identify 13 things to avoid if you want to raise a mentally strong kid who is equipped to tackle life’s toughest challenges.

1. Condoning a Victim Mentality

Striking out at the baseball game or failing a science test doesn’t make a child a victim. Rejection, failure, and unfairness are a part of life.

Refuse to attend your kids’ pity parties. Teach them that no matter how tough or unjust their circumstances, they can always take positive action.

2. Parenting Out of Guilt

Giving into guilty feelings teaches your child that guilt is intolerable. And kids who think guilt is horrible won’t be able to say no to someone who says, “Be a friend and let me copy your paper,” or, “If you loved me, you’d do this for me.”

Show your kids that even though you feel guilty sometimes–and all good parents do–you’re not going to allow your uncomfortable emotions to get in the way of making wise decisions.

3. Making Their Kids the Center of the Universe

If you make your entire life revolve around your kids, they’ll grow up thinking everyone should cater to them. And self-absorbed, entitled adults aren’t likely to get very far in life.

Teach your kids to focus on what they have to offer the world, rather than what they can gain from it…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

Enjoy more “real” happiness by creating more meaning

As I’m sure most of you already know, happiness is not just feeling good.

Happiness is partly feeling good, but it’s also so much more…

…like doing good and connecting with others and being grateful, just to name a few of the more common happiness boosting strategies.

But when it comes to “real and meaningful” happiness, as important as anything is meaning and purpose. So today I’m happy to share with you not one, but two articles focusing on why you should and how you can enjoy more happiness, and a deeper happiness, by living a more meaningful life.

First up, the always interesting and useful Eric Barker writes in Time magazine about “How do we find meaning in life?”

You can check it out HERE

And along similar lines, Pick The Brain published a super practical article titled “8 tips on how to live a meaningful life“…

…and you can read the full post HERE

5 mantras for a happier and calmer you

via Health.com by Rosie McCall

Can one simple phrase actually make a difference in your life? According to Sherianna Boyle, the answer is most definitely yes. She is the author of Mantras Made Easy ($15, amazon.com), a collection of chants and slogans meant to help people tap into the power of positive thinking. “Just like you are programmed to respond to the ring of your phone, you can program repeated words and phrases into your subconscious mind,” writes Boyle, a licensed school psychologist and adjunct psychology professor at Cape Cod Community College. “Mantras are a way to clear up negative actions, opening up new pathways for positive ones.” Whether you’re looking to manage your anxiety, find more joy in your life, or summon the courage to start a new chapter, Boyle’s got a mantra that may help. Below are five of our favorites from her book.

To achieve inner peace…

“My breath is deep; my eyes are soft; I am at peace.”

You are taught many things as a child: how to tie your shoes, brush your teeth, and read and write. Breathing is not something most people were taught how to do. As the benefits of mindfulness(and mantras) spread, this fortunately is beginning to shift. You do not have to be formally trained to learn how to breathe well. You can start right now by reciting this mantra. Take a long, slow, deep inhale (inflating your lower belly) and a slow, extended exhale (drawing your navel in), reciting this mantra in between. Do this for five rounds.

To beat anxiety…

“It’s got to be better than I think.”

This mantra takes you beyond your thoughts. It reminds you that your thoughts could never capture the possibilities and magnificence that are available to you when you allow yourself to move through your feelings and detach from thinking. This mantra was passed on to me by Zoe Marae, PhD. She described it as a way to complete what she referred to as “repeaters.” Repeaters are what you can attract into your life based on old patterns. Reciting this mantra opens the doorway to new ways of being, and as this occurs new perceptions will surface. As Candace Pert, author of Molecules of Emotion, shares, sensations create perceptions. Utilizing this mantra gives you a much more open feeling, providing an inevitable shift in the way you see your world…

…there’s no doubt different things work for different people; and different people like different words/language. But there’s also no doubt that if you can find a version of these that sounds right, you’ll enjoy many benefits. 

So keep reading HERE for the full & original article

27 Smart and Simple Ways to Motivate Yourself

“Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.”
Wayne Dyer

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.”
Zig Ziglar

“I was thinking one day and I realized that if I just had somebody behind me all the way to motivate me I could make a big difference. Nobody came along like that so I just became that person for myself.”
Unknown

Some days you wake up motivated and ready to go. And some days things feel heavy as you arise and it is hard to get going and find that inner drive.

At least in my experience.

So over the past 10+ years I have found some simple and smart strategies that work for me to get back into the right groove and to get things done.

Here are 27 of my favorite tips and habits for doing just that.

1. Just get started and let the motivation catch up with you. You don’t have to wait for motivation to get started. If you want to work in a consistent way every day then sometimes you just have to get going anyway. And the funny thing is that after I have worked for a while things feel easier and easier and more fun and the motivation catches up with me.
2. Start small if big leads you to procrastinating. If a project or task feels too big and daunting don’t let that lead you into procrastination. Instead, break it down into small steps and then take just one of them to start moving forward.
3. Start tiny if a small step still leads you to procrastination. If breaking it down and taking a small step still leads you to procrastinating then go even smaller. Take just a tiny 1-2 minute step forward. That’s it. Because the most important thing is to just get going and to build momentum forward.
4. Reduce the daily distractions. When you have easily accessible distractions all around you then it becomes hard to focus. So shut the door to your office. Put your smart phone in silent mode at the other end of your work space or home. And use an extension for your browser like StayFocusd to keep yourself on track.
5. Get accountability from the people in your life. Tell your friends what you will do on social media, via phone or in real life. Ask one or more of them to regularly check up on you and your progress. By doing this you’ll be a lot less likely to try to weasel out of things or give up at the first obstacle.
6. Get motivation from the people in your life. Spend less time with negative people who always look at the dark or apathetic side of things. And spend more of the time you have now freed up with enthusiastic or motivated people and let their energy flow over to you.
7. Get the motivation from people you don’t know. Don’t limit yourself to just the motivation you can get from the people closest you. There is a ton of motivating books, podcasts, blogs and success stories out there that you can tap into to up or renew your motivation.
8. Play music that gives you energy. One of the simplest things I do when I feel low in energy or motivation is to play music that is upbeat and/or inspires me in some way. A break with a few songs or working while listening to them for a while usually works well.
9. Find the optimism. Pessimism can drain both your motivation and energy. But the positive and constructive way of looking at things can on the other hand energize and recharge your motivation. So when you’re in what looks like a negative situation ask yourself questions like: What’s one thing that’s good about this? And what’s one hidden opportunity here?
10. Be kind to yourself when you stumble. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of beating yourself when you stumble or fail. But that don’t work that well in my experience. You just feel worse and less motivated. So try this the next time: be kind to yourself, nudge yourself back on the path you were on and take one small step forward.
11. Be constructive about the failures. To make your setbacks more valuable and less hurtful be constructive about them. When you stumble ask yourself: what is one thing I can learn from this setback? Then keep that lesson in mind and take action on it to improve what you do.
12. Compare yourself to yourself and see how far you have come. Instead of deflating yourself and your motivation by comparing yourself to others who are so far ahead of you.
13. Compete in a friendly way. When you’re in school or at work make it a friendly competition with a friend to for example finish a boring or routine task first. Just that element of competition tends to liven things up. And if you want to you can also add a small prize for extra motivation, like the winner getting a free ice cream or a beer from the other person.
14. Remind yourself of why you are working toward this. When you’re feeling unmotivated and low in energy it’s easy to lose sight of why you’re doing something. So take 2 minutes and write down your top 3 reasons for doing this work, getting an education, working out, saving that extra money or something else. Put that note where you can see it every day or keep it in your smartphone for easy access when you need a motivational boost.
15. Remind yourself of what you’re moving away from. You can also motivate yourself to get going again by looking at the negative impact of staying on your current path. Ask yourself: What will the consequences be if I continue on this path for 1 more year? And if I do if for 5 more years? I have found that this exercise has given me the kick-start I needed many times in the past years.
16. Be grateful for what you got. When motivation is running low then it’s easy to start seeing your life and the aspects of it through a negative lens. To put your focus on what you still have and who you are – and to recharge with positivity and motivation ­– ask yourself a question like: What are 3 things I sometimes take for granted but can be grateful for in my life? My answers would, for example, be a roof over my head, clean water and not having to go hungry.
17. Mix things up. A rut will kill motivation. So mix things up. Make a competition out of a task with yourself or with someone else. When you work out vary what you do instead of going through the motions. Listen to music and podcasts that you usually don’t listen to. New input and variation tends to be a good way to keep the motivation up (or to recharge it).
18. Declutter your workspace. Take a couple of minutes to clean it up. I find that having an uncluttered and minimalistic workspace helps me to think more clearly and I feel more focused and ready to tackle the next task (or small step).
19. Reduce your to-do list to just one item. An over-stuffed to-do list can be a real motivation killer. So try reducing your current to-do list to just one item. The one that’s most important to you right now or perhaps the one you’ve been procrastinating on for way too long. Then get started by taking a big, small or tiny step. And have another list tucked away somewhere where you can’t see it with other tasks to do later on.
20. Don’t forget about the breaks. Few things can in my experience drain the daily motivation like just working non-stop. Instead, work for 45 minutes each hour and use the rest for a break where you eat a snack, get out for some fresh air or do a bit of stretching. You’ll – perhaps somewhat counter-intuitively – get more done in a day and week and do work of higher quality because your energy, focus and motivation will simply last longer.
21. Adjust your goal size. If a big goal in your life feels overwhelming set a smaller goal to find your motivation again. And if a smaller goal doesn’t seem inspiring try to aim higher and make it bigger goal and see how that affects your motivation.
22. Exercise. Working out doesn’t just affect your body. I find that just 20-30 minutes of lifting free weights releases inner tensions and stress and makes me feel more focused once again.
23. Take 2 minutes to look back at your successes. Close your eyes and let the memories of your biggest successes – no matter in what part of your life – wash over you. Let those most positive memories boost your motivation.
24. Reward yourself and celebrate your successes (no matter how big or small they are). If you’re looking forward to a nice reward that you’re getting yourself after you’re done with a task or a project then your motivation tends to go up. If you celebrate a success in some other way by for example by taking 1 minute to appreciate what you did or by telling someone about your success then that also usually recharges motivation and positivity. So dangle those carrots and celebrate to keep your motivation up.
25. Do a bit of research before you get started. Learning from people who have gone where you want to go and done what you want to do can help you to avoid pitfalls. And to give you a realistic time-table for success. This is important to not get demotivated when things aren’t happening as fast you had wished.
26. Take a 2 minute meditation break. When my mind is a bit tired or perhaps even overloaded my energy and motivation goes down. So in the afternoons – or when needed – I tend to sit down with closed eyes and just focus on my breathing for 2 minutes. This clears my mind and releases inner tensions.
27. Go out in nature. Few things give me as much new energy and motivation to take on life as this does. So I often go out for a walk in the woods or by the sea and I’m just there in the moment with the nature, the fresh air and I don’t think about anything special.

Become happier and more successful by befriending fear!

via Inc.com by Peter Economy 

“Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world.”

― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Poet and philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson stands to be one of the most influential writers and thinkers of the nineteenth century. Chances are, you encountered his work in your high school classroom and perhaps even in a college lecture or two. If you remember nothing else about Emerson, the one thing you should keep in mind is his stance on fear–it gets in the way.

As Emerson suggests, many people succumb to fear before they even get a chance to really start going after what they want. Before they could ever actualize their dreams, fear stopped them from getting into the game in the first place.

So what is there to do? Keep fighting fear? Hope it goes away? Here’s an alternative–embrace it. Here are 3 easy ways to do just that.

1. Recognize it

If you want to utilize fear in a positive manner, you must first recognize when you’re feeling it, without being ashamed. When we consistently ignore our feelings or pretend that they do not exist, there is not much that you can do to tackle any problem that you refuse to believe is there. Instead, know that being afraid is completely normal for everyone…

…keep reading the full & original article HERE

I’m sure you’ve thought about living your best life. Here’s how you actually do it!

via Entrepreneur by Jon Levy

What does the life of your dreams look like? Are you exploring the world and working from your laptop? Are you hanging out with celebrities at award shows? Are you at home spending time with your kids every day?

It’s possible to engineer the lifestyle you want. You might not get every aspect of it, but don’t confuse having everything in life with having the lifestyle of your dreams. You don’t have to earn billions of dollars to have it. You don’t need to come from the right pedigree. (I know I didn’t.)

Related: Why It’s Vital That You Plan Your Life

However, for this life-engineering to work for you — you will need to put effort into the process. Understand this: It will likely take several years to accomplish the planning stage of these goals. What else will it take to engineer the lifestyle of your dreams? Here are some tips to get you started.

1. Clarity.

What is it that you actually want? You don’t need to construct a vision board, just be honest with yourself. How much money will it take until you feel accomplished? What experiences do you want to have? Write it down if it helps you put it into focus.

Dr. Gail Matthews, a psychology professor at Dominican University of California, conducted a study, and found that people who wrote down their goals on a regular basis were 42 percent more likely to achieve them.

Related: Setting Clear Goals

When envisioning what you want, don’t confuse lifestyle with assets. You can drive a Maserati every day without ever owning one-if that’s what you want. In other words, you can experience the lifestyle without the large price tag…

…keep reading HERE for more tips on happiness and living your best possible life!